CUPERTINO, CA – Thousands of reports have recently surfaced regarding iPhone screens across the globe suffering screen burn-ins as a consequence of Delta users relentlessly
To the Editor, Don’t get me wrong, I’m a progressive guy. I listen to The Joe Rogan Experience and even have a soul patch – but I’m calling bullshit on this whole wage gap narrative. Towards the end of last year, I was on top of the world; […]
TOKYO – Miscommunication resulting from language barriers has left the crypto world in a frenzy today, as popular Chinese cryptocurrency influencer Wang Chi mispronounced ‘Litecoin’ as ‘Ritecoin’ in a recent bullish interview. LTC price was unaffected by the mix up, while VEN immediately dropped another 20% Following the […]
PALM BEACH, FL – Local police have responded to a frantic call describing a domestic dispute between local parents and their son. Long time Palm Beach residents, Charles & Judy Wikholm, reportedly alerted the police of their son Alan’s alleged involvement in criminal gang activity. “I knew that […]
WASHINGTON D.C – ICOs and crypto-facing startups have surged in popularity over the last year, having piqued the interest of many existing businesses and high-profile individuals. This is no different in the case of Michelle Obama’s new child-friendly blockchain learning initiative, MegaBlock-Chain. “The concept is in it’s infancy […]
WASHINGTON D.C – White House insiders have leaked reports of U.S President Donald Trump misinterpreting a bill designed to protect cryptocurrency mining from over-regulation. Trump’s purported understanding of the bill was to mean that coal miners are now protected from regulations that keep them from ‘secretly mining’ coal. […]
MINNEAPOLIS, MN – Self described “crypto tycoon” Carter Vir has found himself on the receiving end of an enormous financial loss, one among the thousands of new crypto investors that have fallen victim to taking financial advice from teenage YouTubers. “I… I just don’t know what happened,” Vir […]
REDDIT, Internet – Long-time forum adversaries r/Bitcoin and r/BTC have reportedly set aside their differences to talk shit about centralized, real-time settlement system xRapid. Tensions have recently been high in the crypto community, as numerous initiatives and startups have decidedly chosen to work along banks as opposed to against them have been gaining traction. […]
To the Editor, Look, in my defense I told him that I wasn’t a financial adviser. Did I say it was a sure thing? Well of course I did, BTC was pushing $20,000 fucking dollars! Brandon reached out to me on Facebook last December telling me how guilty […]